In any new relationship, open and honest communication should be established as early as possible. The courting period is often filled with awkwardness and wanting to put your best foot forward, but it is also the time to get to know more about the person you are dating.
And the most straightforward way to know your partner is by asking questions. You can ask questions for a new relationship that tackle personal beliefs or perspective. Just be careful not to cross any lines. The answers you get will help you know if you share similar values and whether this is a relationship you want to invest in.
Why You Need To Ask Questions In Your New Relationship
Asking questions is the most upfront way of getting to know each other. It’s true that the first few dates should be fun and flirty, but a good foundation entails knowing each other’s personal truths and setting some ground rules.
Depending on the questions you ask, it can give you a fun way to know your partner’s personality and gain insights into who they are. It will help you understand whether this person shares your interests, opinions, and beliefs or if you are willing to compromise and meet your partner halfway.
20 Questions For A New Relationship That You Can’t And Shouldn’t Avoid
#1. Who Is Your Best Friend?
It’s often said that we are the average of the five people we surround ourselves with. Whether this is true or not, learning about your partner’s inner circle will help you know your partner better. It will show you what kind of people they surround themselves with and what they value in people.
#2. Where Do You Like To Go On Dates?
Is your partner a homebody, happy cozying up on the couch watching Netflix, or do they love exploring fancy new restaurants every weekend? Do their preferences match yours?
#3. What Do You Think Is Your Biggest Weakness?
Acknowledging one’s faults shows one’s level of self-awareness. It also provides an opportunity to help one another grow.
#4. What Is Your Dream Job?
Knowing your partner’s dream job or career goals can be an opportunity for both of you to find ways to achieve them and not settle for less.
#5. How Do You Handle Conflict?
Disagreements are bound to happen in any relationship. Knowing how someone handles them will help you understand your partner and give them space if needed. It will allow you to handle conflict better.
#6. Do You See Kids In Your Future?
Children can be a deal breaker in a relationship. Knowing your partner’s perspective about whether they want their own kids, adopt, or be child-free will help you decide whether you see a future with them.
#7. What Scent Do You Like The Most?
This fun question can unleash gift ideas for you, giving you an easier time with gifts involving candles, lotions, and perfumes.
#8. When You Have A Bad Day, Do You Prefer Being Left Alone Or Spend Time With Someone?
Everyone deals with an off day in their own way. You may like venting and discussing your issues, but your partner may not.
#9. What Are Some Habits You Consider Weird Or Unpleasant?
It’s another lighthearted question that may just help you keep each other’s annoyances to the minimum.
#10. What’s The Best Birthday Celebration You Had?
This can give you an idea of your partner’s preferences when celebrating milestones and special occasions.
#11. What Is Your Favorite Movie?
A favorite movie can tell you a lot about someone. Are they more into horrors and thrillers, or do they have a more romantic side to them? You’d be surprised to learn some people really struggle to answer this question.
#12. Do You Have A Bucket List? Can You Name Some Of The Things Listed On It?
Learn about your partner’s dream goals while also helping them tick off these items and have a bonding experience together.
#13. If You Can Wear The Same Outfit Over And Over Again, What Will This Outfit Be?
You’ll learn how laidback or high-strung your partner’s sense of style and fashion is. It is also a great way to tell what they think of outward appearances.
#14. Have You Cheated In Any Of Your Relationships Before?
Cheating is a major red flag for many people. But some others are willing to look past one “mistake” and work on their relationship. Which category do you and your partner fall in?
#15. What’s Your Go-to Self-care Habit?
Whether it’s reading a book, enjoying a cup of tea, or getting a full body massage, having self-care habits are important for everyone to unwind.
#16. If You Were Stranded On A Desert, What Three Things Would You Bring?
Your partner’s answers will show you what their priorities are as well as reveal their logical and critical thinking skills.
#17. When Do You Feel The Most Content?
Does being content for you or your partner entail some major financial indulgence, or is it a state of mind?
#18. If You Won Or Had A Million Dollars, What Would You Buy First?
Money can make people change. And if ever your partner gets plenty of money, you’ll know whether their priorities lie.
#19. What Is The Best Way To Describe Your Love Language?
Learning each other’s love language can help set expectations and give you ways to express your love for each other.
#20. What Level Of Commitment Do You Want In A Relationship?
Your level of commitment in a relationship should be discussed sooner than later. You don’t want to be all-in when your partner is just looking for a casual fling.
Pros And Cons Of Asking The Right Questions
When asking these or other questions, make sure you’re asking them without judgment or an accusatory tone. Be open to different perspectives and discussions. Here are some pros and cons to consider before you start these questions.
#1. You establish and foster open communication with one another.
#2. You get to know each other on a deeper and more mature level.
#3. They encourage synergy and acceptance of one another with flaws and shortcomings.
#4. They nurture emotional intelligence.
#5. You can glean the information you need to better understand your partner’s personality.
#1. These questions can be too intrusive, personal, or put pressure if asked incorrectly.
#2. The answers may not always be pleasant and can lead to embarrassment and discomfort.
#3. You may not like the answers you hear, so you must battle your feelings and thoughts.
#4. It can lead to unnecessary doubt and mistrust in the relationship.
#5. There’s a risk of the answers being used against one of the partners during an argument or disagreement.